Gaming can be a great way to bring couples together, whether that be through playing video games, card games or board games. But what happens when you are dating a gamer boyfriend and have no interest in gaming yourself? You might struggle to find unique date ideas that both of you are interested in, and could even find it frustrating if your partner does not priortize your dates as ‘quality time out’.
It can seem especially frustrating if your partner spends hours playing FIFA on the Xbox, when you want to use this time to have a relaxing cuddle together or even go out. While the current restrictions mean that we can’t go on traditional dates like we used to, you can still go on romantic walks, have a winter picnic in the park or even think of quirky date ideas that you can do at home to fuel the passion.
However, it’s important to respect your partner’s passion for gaming, even if you are not a gamer girl, because we all need a respite from everyday life, especially in 2020. Your partner wants to play games because he enjoys them, and this is his escape from real life, whether that be issues at work or in his personal life. It’s not that he wants a break from you, it’s just that he wants some downtime to do what he loves.
Although dating a gamer boyfriend can seem at times like you are competing for his attention, there are also many benefits. Dating gamers gives you time to focus on your own hobbies, allows you to spend time with friends and family without jealousy and could even allow you to find a new appreciation for games. From card games like Poker, to video games like Among Us, you might enjoy a cheeky game or two.
As long as your partner in turn respects your hobbies and appreciates you, dating a gamer does not have to be a painful experience. From turning gaming into an activity that you can both enjoy together, to thinking of quirky date ideas that you can both enjoy as gamers, read on for five practical tips that will help you master dating a gamer, or if you are single, snag your dream guy on a gamer dating site. It’s never too late! After all, you could always use online dating to find your next date, like the app Gamers Dates gamer girls.
Turn Gaming Into An Activity That You Can Enjoy Together
Gaming together might not seem like your cup of tea, but it’s important that we step out of our comfort zone for the ones that we love. After all couples who game together, stay together. As a child I loved playing retro games like Mario, Rayman, The Sims, and had every console from a gameboy to a Playstation, right through to a PSP. However I was never into games that were shooter orientated or based on football.
In contrast my boyfriend grew up playing games like Halo (which he played competitively) and Call of Duty and still plays video games today. He loves playing video games like FIFA, Among Us and Fortnite, but also enjoys playing card and board games like Poker, Cards Against Humanity and Exploding Kittens. I might not be the best gamer, but I have managed to turn gaming into an activity that we can both enjoy.
For example we both love retro games, so if we are playing video games together we will be inspired by our trips to gaming bars like Platform, Shoreditch and Loading in Dalston, creating quirky game nights that we both can’t resist. This can include playing Mario Kart to unleash our competitive spirit and Jackbox Games like the hilairious Fibbage, a bluffing party game which we play with his housemates.
Gaming can also include board games and card games, which we happen to both love. On our first date, my boyfriend took me to Loading, a games bar in Dalston, near where he lived at the time and it was the most fantastic experience. We played card games like Exploding Kittens, and Unstable Unicorns, while supping on game themed cocktails like ‘Crash Bandicoot’. It was here where we truly got to know each other, feel comfortable and in short, gaming brought us together. After all, Gamers date gamer girls.
This inspired us to continue the tradition at home, playing drinking games where we would watch Ru Paul’s Drag Race and make a game out of it. For example, every time Ru Paul says a catchphrase you drink. Everytime someone has a tragic backstory you drink two fingers and whenever someone whacks out the splits you do three fingers. This way, I can watch my favourite show and make a game out of it too.
By combining my favourite show, with his love of games, we were able to make gaming a weekend date night tradition and to do this day, it remains a part of our relationship. Any games that are quirky, fun and out there like ‘That’s What She Said’ is our kind of game.Whether you want to play Monopoly games, adult Poker, Trivia Quizzes or video games, the choice is yours.
Think Of Quirky Date Ideas That You Can Both Enjoy As Gamers
Whether you are a die hard gamer or are willing to try out gaming, a great way to nail dating a gamer boyfriend is by thinking of quirky ‘game led’ date ideas. For example let’s say that you are both a fan of retro games, love arcades that you find down the beach and are obsessed with finding cool date night hot spots that incorporate games like London Shuffle Club and Bounce in Shoreditch.
Even if you are unable to leave your home because of lockdown restrictions, you could still turn your home (or room if you are renting) into a fantastic games lounge, accompanied with a selection of vegan and vegetarian snacks. For example, to get your game night sorted, make a list of what you need. You might choose to recreate the magic of the penny arcades with retro arcade machines or get a new game to play.
Let’s say that your theme is ‘arcade night’. Create a ‘fun novelty themed menu’ including classics like vegan hot dogs drizzled with mustard, tipsy slush puppies and vegan burgers, and give them arcade themed names like ‘The Pikachu Burger’. Next choose the types of arcade games you want to play. Do you want to go retro 80’s with Pacman and Donkey Kong or do you want to play slot machines?
You can get an arcade machine on the cheap from stores like Menkind and Prezzybox, and have a whale of a time gaming together, doing what you guys do best. Not only does this combine his love of gaming with your love of quirkiness, but it also allows you to not compromise your ‘dates together’ because you are both enjoying the games night. It’s important to find what works for you both as a couple.
If you are seperated as a couple you might like to have a ‘virtual game night’, where you pick a game to play over Zoom or Skype. For example let’s say you are playing the game ‘Playing Cards’, which allows you to create a ‘gaming room’. You can invite your partner to join and play card games like ‘Go Fish’, Crazy Eights and a whole host of other card games. This is a great way to keep the relationship thriving.
If like the UK, you have been moved into a tier system, you might also like to go on date nights to bars, resturants or experiences that combine games. For example in London you have cool VR experiences like Otherworld, which also doubles up as a cocktail bar, Four Quarters East, a retro video arcade bar and The Foosball Club, a fun – you guessed it- foosball themed bar, with arcade games.
Game Themed Dates At Home Ideas
- Funfair Champions – Recreate the magic of the funfair at home and go on a ride
- The Sexy Card Game- Make gaming sexy again with cards that’ll make you both sweat
- Couples Trivia- How well do you both really know each other? Find out now!
Set Aside Quality Time For Dates And Introduce Boundaries
Whether you live with your partner, are long distance or see each other regularly, it is so important that you set aside quality time for dates and introduce boundaries. It can be all too easy to become fixated on the latest game, and want to complete levels before you pay attention to your other half, but this can lead to your partner feeling disgruntled that you are not carving out time to focus on them.
If you don’t balance your gaming life and your personal life, this can lead to your partner feeling neglected in the relationship. Instead work out a schedule where you can make time for both gaming and your partner in your life. For example as someone who is dating a gamer boyfriend, we have happily come to a routine which suits us both. He takes time out to go out on dates and will cuddle me while he games.
My partner also comes up with games that we can both enjoy together, taking into account what I do and don’t like. For example as I mentioned earlier, he loves football, and I don’t, so if he comes over my house he will watch less football, and focus on what we can do together. While I am all too happy for him to watch football and play games, he wants to do what would make me happy instead.
Although we don’t live together, when we see each other at the weekends, he will focus on having a relaxing weekend with me, whether that be by watching TV, cuddling, eating delicious food or playing random games. However, when we are at his, he will play games more as he lives with his housemates, but he’ll always make sure that I am feeling comfortable, and does not let gaming take over our relationship.
Even if you are both die hard gamers, it is so important to be able to take time away from gaming. From going on romantic candlelight dinners, to trying out new socially distanced cocktail bars, set aside dates where you don’t talk about gaming and instead focus on each other. Use this time to really get to know each other better, and think about how you see your future panning out with your partner.
If you are into gaming, are dating a gamer boyfriend or are curious about dating a gamer, it’s always imperative that you set boundaries. For example let’s say that your partner plays a lot of games at the weekend to blow off steam and you feel ignored. Set up dates that you can go on, whether that is at home or in the outside world, and establish that your date will be 100% gaming free.
Set a dating plan together, and get your partner involved. For example you might choose the venue for food and he might choose the menu for drinks. Or perhaps your guy might surprise you by planning the whole date and whisking you away on a romantic weekend of a lifetime. Whatever you choose to do, just make sure that both of you are on the same page about taking time out from gaming.
If You Are Not A Gamer Respect Your Partner’s Gaming Passion
Although I said that it is important to set aside time for dates, at the same time, you should also respect your partner’s passion for gaming. Of course a balance has to be set between his love of gaming and your relationship, but be mindful of how you react to his gaming hobby. Just as your partner might celebrate your passions and show interest in what you love, it is so imperative that you do the same.
For example, I might not like football, but I will always ask questions that I know he’ll love answering like ‘what is the most expensive transfer Liverpool has ever had’ or ‘who has scored the most hat tricks this season’. He knows that I don’t like football, but is pleased that I am showing an interest in what he loves, and it’s the same for gaming too. After all, I am someone who is willing to give anything a try.
What’s more, your partner might like to use his gaming time to relax, so whether you choose to cuddle while he games or do your own thing, give your partner space to let off steam. For my boyfriend he loves playing games, because it gives him a chance to relax and unwind from his week. Whenever he is feeling anxious, he will let out his frustrations out during gaming, so it becomes a therapeutic outlet for him.
And he’s not the only one; a study from Oxford University found that video gaming can benefit your mental health.Using actual play-time data, the study, reported in The Guardian concluded that people who played more games tended to have ‘better wellbeing’. So contrary to popular belief gaming isn’t bad for your mental health, but obviously your partner still has to set aside time for you.
So next time that you become frustrated about your partner’s gaming habits, ask yourself why you think your partner games. Is it because he works in a stressful job and needs an outlet to reduce his anxiety and stress levels? Or perhaps it is a hobby that he would like to do competitively. Secondly think about how gaming makes him feel. Does it increase his happiness? Is he a calmer person because of gaming?
When you think about what gaming means to your partner, you can understand why they need it in their lives. As long as it is done in moderation and is not taking over your relationship, dating a gamer boyfriend can be heaps of fun. Give your partner the space that he needs to do what he loves and find what you want to do in your own time too. It could be reading, watching TV or creating a new project.
When Your Partner Is Gaming Use This Time To Focus On Yourself
Speaking of projects, your partner’s extensive gaming sessions can be a chance for you to take up new hobbies and focus on yourself. After all me-time is underrated, and we need to stop thinking of self-care as selfish because it is not. Whether you want to use this time to work on new projects like setting up a blog, want to relax by having a spa day at home or want to watch your favourite show, the choice is yours.
Dating a gamer boyfriend can be a blessing, as it allows you to do your own thing without there being any jealousy involved. For example if my partner is gaming or watching football when we live together, I can use this time to work on my blog, whether that be writing, social media or behind the scenes work. And although we both give each other space, at the same time we always make time for each other.
Let’s say that you are a blogger like myself who has a partner who games. Whether your partner games for 30 minutes or for three hours, use this time wisely to focus on what makes your heart sing. If this is after work, you might like to relax in a bubble bath while reading a book, and feel all your stresses melt away. If this is on a lazy Sunday afternoon, you can use this time to give yourself a pampering session.
If your partner games on a Saturday afternoon, and you are both going on a date in the evening, you can use this time to catch up on any work you might have if you run a side hustle like me, take up new hobbies like virtual salsa dancing or take on a new project like designing your own fashion line. For example my next project is sorting out technical issues with my blog which needs to be done to improve my brand.
While it might not seem like the most exciting project, this is me doing something that is needed for myself and my brand. It will not only boost my SEO, but will also make my website more functional and accessible for my users, and new visitors who come to say hello. There are so many ways that you can focus on some much needed me-time, so be sure to show yourself some self love with the suggestions below.
Me-Time Activities To Make Your Heart Glad
- Bingewatching Ru Paul’s Drag Race
- Learning How To Make Fancy Ass Cocktails
- Creating A Pampering Spa Retreat At Home
- Unplug & Unwind By Doing A Digital Detox
What Are Your Tips For Dating A Gamer Boyfriend?
*Disclaimer
Please note this is a collaborative post but all thoughts are my own and are not affected by monetary compensation. Let me know what your tips on dating a gamer boyfriend are below in the comments!
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Anosa Malanga says
I guess nowadays especially this generation, most boys are very much inclined with gaming. So it’s a normal thing for both men and women who play games and get easily along well. Your insights are indeed true!
Elle says
My husband likes to game during his down time. Thankfully, he is a hard worker and not obsessed with it. – Elle
Juliana says
I’ve a gaming husband that I’ve come to accept and acknowledge. Loving your blog!
Nicole says
I love this blog post! My boyfriend isn’t a true gamer, but definitely loves his few hours a night playing XBox With his friends. And I actually like when he does it because right now during quarantine, we are living and working from home, so we see each other a lot. Those few hours he’s downstairs playing video games, I’m getting quality me time to catch up on my shows and relax alone. I now look forward to him playing video games! We also found games that we like to play together as well, like you talk about. I’m not a gamer, but I do love playing Mario games in his switch or FallGuys on his PlayStation, they are very girl friendly!
Natalie Ann Redman says
Love this! Sam loves his PS4 too haha 😀
Diana | CozyHomeHacks says
Love this post! My boyfriend is a gamer, too! I totally agree on creating some boundaries and allocating time for dates! He is actively trying to do that, because he know I’m not much a gamer, but I support his passion because I want to see him happy!
Meschel says
After reading your post, I found practical tips for kindling relationships even beyond dating. Stay safe!
Payton says
Over the years I’ve discovered that gamers are my “type”. And while I do enjoy video games I’m not skilled enough to be a gamer girl, plus I have a lot of other hobbies. As someone who also has a blog I agree that as long as there is communication and boundaries that it’s kind of great. You have designated time to work on your side hustle. We often sit and enjoy each other in silence while I work on my blog and he games. It’s pretty great!
Vanessa Cheongbak says
I have a gamer boyfriend but all he does is play his game and when I tell him that I love him or I want some attention he gets mad and tells me to stop talking because his friends can hear
Amber Myers says
My husband can be a gamer, but he has balance. I don’t think I could be with someone who was always on a game. It would get old pretty quickly. But thankfully my husband understands it’s not appropriate.
Michael Pittman says
My husband likes to play games on his phone. It used to annoy me but now I just realize it helps him destress from work.
Monica Simpson says
Jackbox games are so fun! We play them with our friends and laugh so hard.
Terri Steffes says
Great ideas! I especially like the idea of having some time to do what each of you likes separately, then do somethng together.
Tasheena says
I really enjoyed reading this post, you provided some really helpful tips.
Richelle Escat says
I don’t have a gamer boyfriend but this post would be so helpful for a friend and for so many people out there who’s struggling with their relationship because of game addiction..
Ave says
My husband is a little bit of a gamer and I like to play sometimes too. I think it’s important to respect each other’s interests but certainly find some activities to enjoy together too!
Alita Pacio says
I love playing games with my boyfriend. It’s definitely a good way to spend time together. Games can bring people closer together
MELANIE EDJOURIAN says
I think it depends on your interests. If you’re into gaming to it can work well as you can spend loads of time together.
Catalina says
You convinced me that it’s not so bad to date a gamer. I love to spend some time alone so I don’t mind to have some time for myself, but not too much!
Rosey says
This is good advice. I know women who do feel bothered about the video games but I never did.
Lavanda Michelle says
I bet it’s a fun day every day. You either hear him yelling at the game or wanting you to play with him. Thanks for sharing!